Caress of God's Grace (Am I Looking?)

I am going into the studio with Sam Hill next week and we are hoping to put down some spoken word/songs in a, hopefully, interesting way for late Spring release. I have been a bit sceptical but a day in the studio last December has me almost convinced that we have something. It's usually the other way round and the artist has to convince the record company but there you go!!!!

The whole theme for the album is Grace. In the studio we came up with this poem/song and I thought I'd share the words and explain it...

THE CARESS OF GOD’S GRACE (Am I Looking)

Am I looking for warmth in the drunkard’s eye
There is a song on the Whispers of grace album that I wrote the lyric too, based on words that New Zealand speaker Mike Riddell said about a prostitue drug addict passionate for jesus woman in his Church. There are not always solutions and It Depends(a song of Sam’s on the album) where you start and what is going on in your life. Mike’s girl died and he said “It may be a blasphemy but I believe that it is right. God loved her in her drug induced state as much as when she was in Church. I thought that was a great thought and wrote Soaked in a dearer Wine about for a guy that I know. Below his alcoholic struggles there is the warmth of the Spirit but who is looking?

Am I looking for the bright in the night time sky
We watch TV while the Almighty puts out the most incredible light show ever – every night. Flannery O’Connor says something about the plan that is obvious in the stars but who nobody is looking.

Am I looking down alleys for some kind of epiphany
The way the sun or moon shines across a back alley street can light up the dingiest corners.

Am I looking for magic in the everyday ordinary
If we look then God is right there in what we see as unspectacular. Van Morrison always said his songs were to make the streets he grew up on transcendent.

Am I looking for misunderstanding in an angry fist
Sometimes before we judge the man who throws the punch or the woman who strikes out we need to be aware of the circumstances of their lives. It’s easy to point the finger from our trouble free world and miss the injustice and pain and hurt that God is involved in and angry about.

Am I looking for memories of beauty behind the mist?
My old Bible Class teacher, John Suitters used to say that when he looks out his window he can see Slemish mountain. Then sometimes when it is misty he cannot see it but he continues to believe in it’s existence by remembering…

Am I looking in the puddle for the colours incandescent?
Colours in a puddle. Beautiful.

Am I looking in the mirror for a trace of the transcendent?
Me. So sinful and selfish and so much needing help. But look closer and there is the image of God. Tarnished and needing restoration but God all the same. And then as years go by little traces of his grace changing me. Too slowly for my wife and children’s good but changing me all the same. God at work in the man in the mirror.

Am I looking always looking? Eyes open, open wide Am I looking always looking At beyond and at the inside

Am I looking for forever in the gembok’s dance
My favourite animal in the world is the South African gembok. Beautifully coloured and what a dancer. Nimble sign of beyond.

Am I looking for some meaning in this lucky chance
We are big into semantics in Northern Ireland. Say you were lucky and there is a theological witch-hunt. It’s just definitions and human and divine perspectives. Thought I’d have fun with our uptightness.

Am I looking in the junk for some hope of resurrection
My friend Julie Lee takes junk and redeems it into works of art. She’s an artist working a lovely metaphor. On the day I was writing this verse in the studio Neil Costello was telling us about finding a guitar in a skip and restoring it.

Am I looking ‘neath the scars for some object of affection
Pretty looks are cultural. Beauty is deep down behind the skin.

Am I looking for now in the old man’s song
I was listening a lot to Johnny Cash and Bob Dylan the week I wrote this. Still am. They are not irrelevant because of their age. Maybe I was thinking of me being old too.

Am I looking for the truth where it shouldn’t belong
We are too sure of knowing where God will be found or who is speaking truth. Usually if someone only believes 80% of what we do then we don’t believe 100% of what he says. I just do not believe that God is so easily tied down as to where and in whom he will speak to me.

Am I looking in my pride for some reason for confession
To think we have it all together as evangelical Christians have a tendency of doing. Confess it. In Northern Ireland Protestants have traditionally blamed the Catholics for the troubles and felt arrogant of their innocence. There are no peace makers in a proud people. Forgive us Lord.

Am I looking in my sins for the spirit’s helpful lessons
Even sin which we think is always bad and of the devil can be used by God to teach us. Grace eh!!!! The wonder of God eh!!!!! Fascinating.

Am I looking always looking
Eyes open, open wide
Am I looking always looking
At beyond and at the inside

Do I see the caress of God’s grace
In the kiss blown by a little child
Do I see the caress of God’s grace
In the stranger’s passing smile
Do I see the caress of God’s grace
In a loved one’s gentle hand
Do I see the caress of God’s grace
In the these footprints in the sand.

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